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HERO's apartment.
[Enter HERO, MARGARET, and URSULA]
HERO
Good Ursula wake my cousin Beatrice, and desire her to rise.
URSULA
I will lady.
HERO
And bid her come hither.
URSULA
Well.
[Exit]
MARGARET
Troth I think your other rabato were better.
HERO
No pray thee good Meg, I'll wear this.
MARGARET
By my troth's not so good, and I warrant your cousin will say so.
HERO
My cousin's a fool, and thou art another, I'll wear none but this.
MARGARET
I like the new tire within excellently, if the hair were a thought browner:
and your gown's a most rare fashion in faith, I saw the Duchess of Milan's
gown that they praise so.
HERO
O that exceeds they say.
MARGARET
By my troth's but a nightgown in respect of yours, cloth of gold and
cuts, and laced with silver, set with pearls, down sleeves, side sleeves,
and skirts, round underborne with a bluish tinsel, but for a fine quaint
graceful and excellent fashion, yours is worth ten on it.
HERO
God give me joy to wear it, for my heart is exceeding heavy.
MARGARET
'Twill be heavier soon, by the weight of a man.
HERO
Fie upon thee, art not ashamed?
MARGARET
Of what lady? of speaking honorably? Is not marriage honorable in a beggar?
Is not your lord honorable without marriage? I think you would have me say,
saving your reverence a husband: and bad thinking do not wrest true
speaking, I'll offend nobody, is there any harm in the heavier for a
husband? None I think, and it be the right husband, and the right wife,
otherwise 'tis light and not heavy, ask my Lady Beatrice else, here she
comes.
HERO
Good morrow coz.
BEATRICE
Good morrow sweet Hero.
HERO
Why how now? do you speak in the sick tune?
BEATRICE
I am out of all other tune, methinks.
MARGARET
Clap us into Light of love, (that goes without a burden,) do you sing it and
I'll dance it.
BEATRICE
Ye light of love with your heels, then if your husband have stables
enough, you'll see he shall lack no barns.
MARGARET
O illegitimate construction! I scorn that with my heels.
BEATRICE
'Tis almost five o'clock cousin, tis time you were ready, By my troth I am
exceeding ill, heigh-ho.
MARGARET
For a hawk, a horse, or a husband?
BEATRICE
For the letter that begins them all, H.
MARGARET
Well, and you be not turned Turk, there's no more sailing by the star.
BEATRICE
What means the fool trow?
MARGARET
Nothing I, but God send every one their heart's desire.
HERO
These gloves the count sent me, they are an excellent perfume.
BEATRICE
I am stuffed cousin, I cannot smell.
MARGARET
A maid and stuffed! there's goodly catching of cold.
BEATRICE
O God help me, God help me, how long have you professed apprehension?
MARGARET
Even since you left it, doth not my wit become me rarely?
BEATRICE
It is not seen enough, you should wear it in your cap, by my troth, I am
sick.
MARGARET
Get you some of this distilled Carduus Benedictus and lay it to your heart,
it is the only thing for a qualm.
HERO
There thou prickest her with a thistle.
BEATRICE
Benedictus, why Benedictus? you have some moral in this Benedictus.
MARGARET
Moral? No by my troth, I have no moral meaning, I meant plain
holy thistle, you may think perchance that I think you are in love, nay by
our lady I am not such a fool to think what I list, nor I list not to think
what I can, nor indeed I cannot think, if I would think my heart out of
thinking, that you are in love, or that you will be in love, or that you can
be in love: Yet Benedick was such another, and now is he become a man, he
swore he would never marry, and yet now in despite of his heart he eats
his meat without grudging, and how you may be converted I know not, but
methinks you look with your eyes as other women do.
BEATRICE
What pace is this that thy tongue keeps.
MARGARET
Not a false gallop.
URSULA
Madam, withdraw, the prince, the count, Signior Benedick, Don John, and all
the gallants of the town are come to fetch you to church.
HERO
Help to dress me good coz, good Meg, good Ursula.
[Exeunt]