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All's Well That Ends Well

Act II, Scene 3

Paris. The KING's palace.
 
[Enter BERTRAM, LAFEU, and PAROLLES]
 
LAFEU
They say miracles are past, and we have our philosophical persons, to make modern and familiar, things supernatural and causeless. Hence is it, that we make trifles of terrors, ensconcing ourselves into seeming knowledge, when we should submit ourselves to an unknown fear.
 
PAROLLES
Why 'tis the rarest argument of wonder, that hath shot out in our latter times.
 
BERTRAM
And so 'tis.
 
LAFEU
To be relinquished of the artists.
 
PAROLLES
So I say. both of Galen and Paracelsus.
 
LAFEU
Of all the learned and authentic fellows.
 
PAROLLES
Right so I say.
 
LAFEU
That gave him out incurable.
 
PAROLLES
Why there 'tis, so say I too.
 
LAFEU
Not to be helped.
 
PAROLLES
Right, as 'twere a man assured of a--
 
LAFEU
Uncertain life, and sure death.
 
PAROLLES
Just, you say well: so would I have said.
 
LAFEU
I may truly say, it is a novelty to the world.
 
PAROLLES
It is indeed if you will have it in showing, you shall read it in what do you call there?
 
LAFEU
A showing of a heavenly effect in an earthly actor.
 
PAROLLES
That's it, I would have said, the very same.
 
LAFEU
Why your dolphin is not lustier: 'fore me I speak in respect--
 
PAROLLES
Nay, 'tis strange, 'tis very strange, that is the brief and the tedious of it, and he's of a most facinerious spirit, that will not acknowledge it to be the--
 
LAFEU
Very hand of heaven.
 
PAROLLES
Aye, so I say.
 
LAFEU
In a most weak--
 
PAROLLES
And debile minister great power, great transcendence, which should indeed give us a further use to be made, than alone the recovery of the king, as to be
 
LAFEU
Generally thankful.
 
[Enter KING, HELENA, and Attendants]
 
PAROLLES
I would have said it, you say well: Here comes the king.
 
 
LAFEU
Lustig, as the Dutchman says: I'll like a maid the better whilst I have a tooth in my head: why he's able to lead her a coranto.
 
PAROLLES
Mort du vinaigre, is not this Helen?
 
LAFEU
'Fore God I think so.
 
KING
       T   T   .  T        ,          ,          ,
      Go call before | me all | the lords | in court,
       ,           ,       ,        ,           ,
      Sit my | preserv|er by | thy pat|ient's side,
            ,            ,         ,           ,          ,
      And with | this health|ful hand | whose^ban|ished sense
             ,         ,        ,        ,        ,
      Thou hast | repealed,| a sec|ond time | receive
           ,      ,       ,        ,         ,
      The con|firma|tion of | my prom|ised gift,
             ,        ,          ,
      Which^but | attends | thy nam|ing.  \\
              ,           ,            ,           ,        ,      2->
      Fair* maid | send^forth | thine eye,| this youth|ful par||cel
           x       ,  2        ,         ,      ,
      Of noble | bachelors,| stand at | my be|stowing,
            ,           ,          x           ,         ,
      Ore whom | both sove|reign power,| and fath|er's voice
          ,        ,          ,       ,         ,
      I have | to use;| thy frank | elec|tion make,
        ,           x           T     .    T    T      2     ,
      Thou hast | power to | choose, and they none | to forsake.
 
[Enter three or four Lords]
 
HELENA
           ,        ,     T    T   .   T    2     ,
      To each | of you,| one fair and vir|tuous mistress; ????
       ,            T     T     T    2     ,         ,
      Fall when | love please, mar|ry to each | but one.
 
LAFEU
            ,     ,    ,                 ,      ,
      I'd give | bay Curt/al, and | his fur|niture,
           ,          ,           ,              ,     ,
      My mouth | no more | were brok|en than / these boys',
            ,        ,        ,
      And writ | as lit|tle beard.
 
KING
                                      ,           ,
                                  Peruse | them well:
       T   T   .   T          ,        x       ,
      Not one of those,| but had | a noble | father.
 
HELENA
Gentlemen, Heaven hath through me, restored the king to health.
 
ALL
          ,      ,                 ,      x          ,
      We und|erstand | it, and / thank heaven | for you.
 
HELENA
      ,   2     ,         ,           ,          ,   2
      I am a | simple | maid, and | therein | wealthiest
           ,        ,        ,      ,       ,
      That I | protest,| I simp|ly am | a maid:
            x           ,    ,    2         ,       ,
      Please it your | maje|sty, I have | done al|ready:
            ,       ,         ,            ,       ,
      The blush|es in | my cheeks | thus^whis|per me,
           ,            ,                ,          ,       ,
      We blush | that thou | shouldst^choose,| but be | refused;
       T   .    T     T      ,             ,          x
      Let the white death | sit on | thy cheek | forever,
              ,           ,        ,
      We'll nere | come^there | again.
 
KING
                                         T     T    .   T
                                       Make choice and see,
            ,           ,           ,          ,        ,
      Who shuns | thy love,| shuns^all | his love | in me.
 
HELENA
            ,      ,         ,      ,      ,
      Now* Di|an from | thy alt|ar do | I fly,
       ,    2    , 2       ,           T    T    T
      And to im|perial | Love, that | god most high
                ,      ,      ,                ,         ,
      Do my / sighs stream:| Sir, will | you hear | my suit?
 
FIRST LORD
            ,
      And grant | it.
 
HELENA
                         ,           ,          ,         ,
                      Thanks | sir, all | the rest | is mute.
 
LAFEU
      ,         ,          ,           ,            ,
      I had | rather | be in | this^choice,| than throw
        ,   ,              __
      Ames-ace / for my | life.  \\
 
HELENA
           ,      ,            ,                 ,    ,
      The hon|or sir | that flames | in your / fair eyes,
          ,        ,      ,     ,     2           ,
      Before | I speak | too threat/eningly | replies:
        T    T    .     T         ,       ,        ,
      Love make your* fort|unes twen|ty times | above
       ,          T   Tx     T         ,        ,
      Her that | so wishes, and | her hum|ble love.
 
SECOND LORD
          ,       ,          ,
      No bet|ter if | you please.
 
HELENA
                                       ,        ,
                                  My wish | receive,
              ,       T    T     .   T       ,         ,
      Which great | Love grant, and so | I take | my leave.
 
LAFEU
Do all they deny her? And they were sons of mine, I'd have them whipped, or I would send them to the Turk to make eunuchs of.
 
HELENA
          ,       ,          ,          ,             ,
      Be not | afraid | that I | your hand | should take;
            ,      ,         ,      .    T   T    T
      I'll nev|er do | you wrong | for your own sake:
        ,          ,           ,         ,         ,
      Blessing | upon | your vows,| and in | your bed
        T    Tx    T         ,        ,     ,
      Find fairer for|tune, if | you ev|er wed.
 
LAFEU
These boys are boys of ice, they'll none have her: sure they are bastards to the English, the French nere got 'em.
 
HELENA
       ,              ,          ,       ,          ,
      You are | too young,| too hap|py, and | too good
           ,          ,       ,              ,   ,
      To make | yourself | a son | out of / my blood.
 
FOURTH LORD
        T   T   T     T    T   T   oo
      Fair one, I | think not so.|
 
LAFEU
There's one grape yet, I am sure thy father drunk wine. But if thou best not an ass, I am a youth of fourteen: I have known thee already.
 
HELENA
          ,         ,        ,          ,        ,
      I dare | not say | I take | you, but | I give
       ,           ,         ,       ,         ,
      Me and | my serv|ice, ev|er whilst | I live
       ,            ,        x       ,            ,
      Into | your guid|ing power:| This is | the man.
 
KING
             ,            ,         ,          ,           ,
      Why* then | young^Bert|ram, take | her she's | thy wife.
 
BERTRAM
           ,         ,     ,      2     ,            ,
      My wife | my liege?| I shall be|seech your | highness
           ,       ,           ,         ,         ,
      In such | a bus|iness, give | me leave | to use
            ,               ,    ,
      The help | of mine / own eyes.  \\
 
KING
Knowst thou not Bertram what she has done for me?
 
BERTRAM
Yes my good lord, but never hope to know why I should marry her.
 
KING
              ,        2       ,          ,         ,      ,
      Thou knowst | she has raised | me from | my sick|ly bed.
 
BERTRAM
           ,        ,        ,     .   T    T   T
      But fol|lows it | my lord,| to bring me down
            ,     2      ,      ,           ,          ,
      Must^ans|wer for your | raising?| I know | her well:
           ,          ,        ,        ,          ,
      She had | her breed|ing at | my fath|er's charge;
          ,        ,          ,      2     ,         ,
      A poor | physi|cian's daught|er my wife?| Disdain
        ,           ,         x
      Rather | corrupt | me ever.  \\
 
KING
            ,      x         2      ,         ,          ,
      'Tis on|ly title | thou disdainst | in her,| the which
       2      ,      T     T     T        ,           ,
      I can build | up: Strange is | it that | our bloods
          ,         ,      .    T      T    T         x
      Of col|or, weight,| and heat, poured all | together,  ??
              ,          ,          ,                ,    ,
      Would quite | confound | distinc|tion: yet / stand off
          ,             ,   ,       ,        ,
      In dif|ferences^/so might|y. If | she be
       ,             ,    2      ,           ,         ,
      All that | is vir|tuous (save | what thou | dislikst)
          ,        ,          ,          ,         ,
      A poor | physi|cian's daught|er, thou | dislikst
          ,       ,          ,         ,        ,
      Of vir|tue for | the name:| but do | not so:
            ,        ,           ,    2      ,          ,
      From low|est place,| when vir|tuous things | proceed,
            ,         ,      ,      2     ,        ,
      The place | is dig|nified | by the do|er's deed,
              ,        ,            x          ,        ,
      Where great | addi|tions swell us,| and vir|tue none,
          ,       ,        ,        ,       ,
      It is | a drop|sied hon|or. Good | alone,
           ,         ,        ,      ,            ,
      Is good | without | a name?| Vileness | is so:
            ,     ,        ,        ,           ,
      The prop|erty | by what | it is,| should go,
       ,             x      ,         T      T     T
      Not by | the title.| She is | young, wise, fair,
           ,         ,        ,        ,   2     ,
      In these,| to nat|ure she's | immed|iate heir:
       .    T     T    T        ,        ,         ,
      And these breed hon|or: that | is hon|or's scorn,
              ,      ,        ,        ,         ,
      Which chal|lenges | itself | as hon|or's born,
                ,    ,          ,     ,        ____
      And is / not like | the sire:| honors | thrive,
             ,       ,          ,         ,        ,
      When rath|er from | our acts | we them | derive
            ,         ,              ,    ,         ,
      Than our | forego|ers: the / mere words,| a slave
           ,         ,       ,        ,       ,
      Deboshed | on eve|ry tomb,| on eve|ry grave:
         ,       ,       ,        ,         ,
      A ly|ing troph|y, and | as oft | is dumb,
               ,           ,       ,   2    ,         ,
      Where* dust,| and damned | obli|vion is | the tomb.
          ,         ,         ,            ,          ,
      Of hon|ored bones | indeed,| what should | be said?
       .   T    T     T           ,         ,       ,
      If thou canst like | this creat|ure, as | a maid,
      ,           ,          ,     ,            ,
      I can | create | the rest:| virtue,| and she
                ,    x      ,             ,           ,
      Is her / own dower:| honor | and wealth | from me.
 
BERTRAM
         ,        ,          ,            ,          x
      I can|not love | her, nor | will strive | to do it.
 
KING
              ,           ,         ,                ,           ,
      Thou wrongst | thyself,| if thou | shouldst^strive | to choose.
 
HELENA
            ,          ,         ,          ,          ,
      That you | are well | restored | my lord,| I'm glad:
       T   .    T   T
      Let the rest go. \\
 
KING
          ,        ,         ,       ,            ,
      My hon|or's at | the stake,| which to | defeat
          ,         ,        ,        ,      T   T    T
      I must | produce | my pow|er. Here,| take her hand,
       ___      ,         ,       ,         T    T    T
      Proud | scornful | boy, un|worthy | this good gift, (hex with prev)
             ,         ,         ,        ,       ,
      That dost | in vile | mispris|ion shack|le up
           ,         ,        ,           ,           ,
      My love,| and her | desert:| that canst | not^dream,
           ,       ,       ,       ,         ,
      We pois|ing us | in her | defec|tive scale,
              ,       ,    2        ,            T   T    T
      Shall weigh | thee to the | beam: that | wilt not know,
          ,       ,        ,            ,        ,
      It is | in us | to plant | thine^hon|or, where
            ,          ,         ,      ,              ,
      We please | to have | it grow.| Check thy | contempt:
        ,          ,      ,         ,              ,
      Obey | our will,| which tra|vails in | thy good:
          ,      ,             ,          ,      ,
      Believe | not thy | disdain,| but pres|ently
       T   T    T     ,             2  ,    2    ,
      Do thine own | fortunes | that obed|ient right
              ,         ,      ,                x      ,
      Which^both | thy du|ty owes,| and our / power claims,
         ,          ,             ,         ,        x
      Or I | will throw | thee* from | my care | forever
       ,           ,         ,          ,         ,
      Into | the stag|gers, and | the care|less lapse
           ,          ,    2       ,      2    ,           ,
      Of youth | and ig|norance: both | my revenge | and hate
        ,         ,      ,     2        ,        ,
      Loosing | upon | thee, in the | name of | justice,
           ,     T    T    .  T       ,            ,      ->
      Without | all terms of pit|y. Speak,| thine^ans||wer.
 
BERTRAM
       ,     2    ,          ,        ,       ,
      pard|on my gra|cious lord:| for I | submit
          ,      ,          ,      ,   2     ,
      My fan|cy to | your^eyes,| when I con|sider
             ,        ,        ,           ,         x
      What great | creat|ion, and | what dole | of honor
        ,                  x         ,          ,            ,
      Flies where*| you bid it:| I find | that she | which^late
           ,       ,          ,        T    T    .  T
      Was in | my nobl|er thoughts,| most base: is now
            ,        2        ,    ,     ,     ,
      The prais|ed of the / king, who | so en|nobled,
          ,           ,
      Is as |'twere born | so.
 
KING
                                 ,         ,         ,
                               Take | her by | the hand,
            ,         ,         ,          ,          x
      And tell | her she | is thine:| to whom | I promise
          ,       ,         ,        ,       ,
      A count|erpoise:| if not | to thy | estate,
         ,         ,        ,
      A bal|ance more | replete.
 
BERTRAM
                                     ,          ,
                                 I take | her hand.
 
KING
        ,   ,                   ,      ,         ,
      Good for/tune, and | the fav|or of | the king
        ,     ,        ,   ,           ,   ,
      Smile upon this contract: whose^ceremony  ????
              ,       ,   2              ,    ,    ,
      Shall seem | exped|ient on the // now-born brief,
           ,         ,         ,          ,        ,
      And be | performed | tonight:| the sol|emn feast
              ,        ,      ,         ,        ,
      Shall more | attend | upon | the com|ing space,
         ,        ,         ,       ,          ,
      Expec|ting abs|ent friends.| As thou | lovst her,
             ,         ,      ,          ,          ,
      Thy love's | to me | relig|ious: else,| does err.
 
[Exeunt all but LAFEU and PAROLLES]
 
LAFEU
Do you hear monsieur? a word with you.
 
PAROLLES
Your pleasure sir.
 
LAFEU
Your lord and master did well to make his recantation.
 
PAROLLES
Recantation? My lord? my master?
 
LAFEU
Aye: is it not a language I speak?
 
PAROLLES
A most harsh one, and not to be understood without bloody succeeding. My master?
 
LAFEU
Are you companion to the Count Rousillon?
 
PAROLLES
To any count, to all counts: to what is man.
 
LAFEU
To what is count's man: count's master is of another style.
 
PAROLLES
You are too old sir: let it satisfy you, you are too old.
 
LAFEU
I must tell thee sirrah, I write man: to which title age cannot bring thee.
 
PAROLLES
What I dare too well do, I dare not do.
 
LAFEU
I did think thee for two ordinaries: to be a pretty wise fellow, thou didst make tolerable vent of thy travel, it might pass: yet the scarfs and the bannerets about thee, did manifoldly dissuade me from believing thee a vessel of too great a burden. I have now found thee, when I lose thee again, I care not: yet art thou good for nothing but taking up, and that thou it scarce worth.
 
PAROLLES
Hadst thou not the privilege of antiquity upon thee.
 
LAFEU
Do not plunge thyself too far in anger, lest thou hasten thy trial: which if, Lord have mercy on thee for a hen, so my good window of lattice fare thee well, thy casement I need not open, for I look through thee. Give me thy hand.
 
PAROLLES
My lord, you give me most egregious indignity.
 
LAFEU
Aye with all my heart, and thou art worthy of it.
 
PAROLLES
I have not my lord deserved it.
 
LAFEU
Yes good faith, every dram of it, and I will not bate thee a scruple.
 
PAROLLES
Well, I shall be wiser.
 
LAFEU
Even as soon as thou canst, for thou hast to pull at a smack of the contrary. If ever thou beest bound in thy scarf and beaten, thou shalt find what it is to be proud of thy bondage. I have a desire to hold my acquaintance with thee, or rather my knowledge, that I may say in the default, he is a man I know.
 
PAROLLES
My lord you do me most insupportable vexation.
 
LAFEU
I would it were hell-pains for thy sake, and my poor doing eternal: for doing I am past, as I will by thee, in what motion age will give me leave.
 
[Exit]
 
PAROLLES
Well, thou hast a son shall take this disgrace off me; scurvy, old, filthy, scurvy lord: Well, I must be patient, there is no fettering of authority. I'll beat him (by my life) if I can meet him with any convenience, and he were double and double a lord. I'll have no more pity of his age than I would have of--I'll beat him, and if I could but meet him again.
 
[Enter LAFEU]
 
LAFEU
Sirrah, your lord and master's married, there's news for you: you have a new mistress.
 
PAROLLES
I most unfeignedly beseech your lordship to make some reservation of your wrongs. He is my good lord, whom I serve above is my master.
 
LAFEU
Who? God?
 
PAROLLES
Aye sir.
 
LAFEU
The devil it is, that's thy master. Why dost thou garter up thy arms of this fashion? dost make hose of sleeves? do other servants so? Thou wert best set thy lower part where thy nose stands. By mine honor, if I were but two hours younger, I'd beat thee: methinks, thou art a general offense, and every man should beat thee: I think thou wast created for men to breathe themselves upon thee.
 
PAROLLES
This is hard and undeserved measure my lord.
 
LAFEU
Go to sir, you were beaten in Italy for picking a kernel out of a pomegranate, you are a vagabond, and no true traveller: you are more saucy with lords and honorable personages, than the commission of your birth and virtue gives you heraldry. You are not worth another word, else I'd call you knave. I leave you.
 
[Exit. Enter BERTRAM]
 
PAROLLES
Good, very good, it is so then: good, very good, let it be concealed awhile.
 
BERTRAM
Undone, and forfeited to cares forever.
 
PAROLLES
What's the matter sweetheart?
 
BERTRAM
Although before the solemn priest I have sworn, I will not bed her.
 
PAROLLES
What? What sweetheart?
 
BERTRAM
      ,         ,         ,          ,        ,
      O my | Parol|les, they | have mar|ried me:
        ,    2       ,         ,          ,       ,
      I'll to the | Tuscan | wars, and | never | bed her.
 
PAROLLES
         ,     2     ,    ,              T   T    Tx
      France is a | dog-hole,/ and it | no more merits,
            ,              ,     ,     ,        __
      The tread | of a / man's foot:| to the | wars.
 
BERTRAM
There's letters from my mother: what the import is, I know not yet.
 
PAROLLES
Aye that would be known: to the wars my boy, to the wars.
           ,          ,      ,   .  T   T  T
      He wears | his hon|or in | a box unseen,
             ,          ,      ,      ,         ,
      That hugs | his kick|y-wick|y here | at home,
        ,             ,      ,       ,         ,
      Spending | his man|ly mar|row in | her arms
               ,         ,           ,           ,        ,
      Which should | sustain | the bound | and high | curvet
           ,       ,      ,       x         ,
      Of Mars|'s fier|y steed:| To other | regions,
         ,             x      ,          ,             ,
      France is | a stable,| we that | dwell in | it jades,
        ,    ,             ___
      Therefore / to the | war!  \\
 
BERTRAM
           ,         ,          ,         ,        ,
      It shall | be so,| I'll send | her to | my house,
           ,          ,       ,         ,        ,
      Acquaint | my moth|er with | my hate | to her,
            ,        ,        ,      ,              ,
      And where|fore I | am fled:| write to | the king
        ,       2      T    T    T           ,        ,
      That which^I | durst not speak.| His pres|ent gift
              ,       ,        ,       ,   2     ,
      Shall furn|ish me | to those | Ital|ian fields
             ,      ,          ,      T   .  T    T
      Where nob|le fel|lows strike:| war is no strife
                 ,    ,      ,           ,        ,
      To the / dark house,| and the | detes|ted wife.
 
PAROLLES
             ,        ,   2    ,         ,          ,
      Will this | capric|cio hold | in thee,| art sure?
 
BERTRAM
           ,     ,   2       ,        ,       ,
      Go with | me to my | chamber,| and ad|vise me.
             ,            ,        ,       ,      o
      I'll send | her straight | away:| tomor|row,
        ,             ,     ,    2       ,        ,
      I'll to | the wars,| she to her | single | sorrow.
 
PAROLLES
            ,       T     T       T        ,     2            ,
      Why these | balls bound, there's | noise in it.| 'Tis hard
          ,      ,   ,                ,              ,
      A young | man mar/ried, is | a man | that's marred:
        ,           ,          ,           ,        ,
      Therefore | away,| and leave | her brave|ly: go,
            ,          ,          ,           ,         ,
      The king | has done | you wrong:| but hush |'tis so.
 
[Exeunt]

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