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The same.
[Enter ARMADO and MOTH]
ARMADO
Boy, what sign is it when a man of great spirit grows melancholy?
MOTH
A great sign sir, that he will look sad.
ARMADO
Why? Sadness is one and the self-same thing dear imp.
MOTH
No no, O Lord sir no.
ARMADO
How canst thou part sadness and melancholy my tender juvenal?
MOTH
By a familiar demonstration of the working, my tough signior.
ARMADO
Why tough signior? Why tough signior?
MOTH
Why tender juvenal? why tender juvenal?
ARMADO
I spoke it tender juvenal, as a congruent epitheton appertaining to thy
young days, which we may nominate tender.
MOTH
And I tough signior, as an appertinent title to your old time, which we may
name tough.
ARMADO
Pretty and apt.
MOTH
How mean you sir, I pretty, and my saying apt? Or I apt, and my saying
pretty?
ARMADO
Thou pretty because little.
MOTH
Little pretty, because little; wherefore apt?
ARMADO
And therefore apt, because quick.
MOTH
Speak you this in my praise master?
ARMADO
In thy condign praise.
MOTH
I will praise an eel with the same praise.
ARMADO
What: that an eel is ingenious.
MOTH
That an eel is quick.
ARMADO
I do say thou art quick in answers. Thou heatest my blood.
MOTH
I am answered sir.
ARMADO
I love not to be crossed.
MOTH
He speaks the mere contrary, crosses love not him.
ARMADO
I have promised to study three years with the duke.
MOTH
You may do it in an hour sir.
ARMADO
Impossible.
MOTH
How many is one thrice told?
ARMADO
I am ill at reckoning, it fitteth the spirit of a tapster.
MOTH
You are a gentleman and a gamester sir.
ARMADO
I confess both, they are both the varnish of a complete man.
MOTH
Then I am sure you know how much the gross sum of deuce-ace amounts to.
ARMADO
It doth amount to one more than two.
MOTH
Which the base vulgar do call three.
ARMADO
True.
MOTH
Why sir is this such a piece of study? Now here is three studied, ere ye'll
thrice wink, and how easy it is to put years to the word three, and study
three years in two words, the dancing horse will tell you.
ARMADO
A most fine figure.
MOTH
To prove you a cipher.
ARMADO
I will hereupon confess I am in love: and as it is base for a soldier to
love; so am I in love with a base wench. If drawing my sword against the
humor of affection, would deliver me from the reprobate thought of it, I
would take Desire prisoner, and ransom him to any French courtier for a
new-devised courtesy. I think scorn to sigh, methinks I should outswear
Cupid. Comfort me boy, what great men have been in love?
MOTH
Hercules master.
ARMADO
Most sweet Hercules: More authority dear boy, name more; and sweet my child
let them be men of good repute and carriage.
MOTH
Samson master, he was a man of good carriage, great carriage, for he carried
the town-gates on his back like a porter: and he was in love.
ARMADO
O well-knit Samson, strong-jointed Samson, I do excel thee in my rapier, as
much as thou didst me in carrying gates. I am in love too. Who was Samson's
love my dear Moth?
MOTH
A woman, master.
ARMADO
Of what complexion?
MOTH
Of all the four, or the three, or the two, or one of the four.
ARMADO
Tell me precisely of what complexion.
MOTH
Of the sea-water green sir.
ARMADO
Is that one of the four complexions?
MOTH
As I have read sir, and the best of them too.
ARMADO
Green indeed is the color of lovers; but to have a love of that color,
methinks Samson had small reason for it. He surely affected her for her wit.
MOTH
It was so sir, for she had a green wit.
ARMADO
My love is most immaculate white and red.
MOTH
Most maculate thoughts master, are masked under such colors.
ARMADO
Define, define, well-educated infant.
MOTH
My father's wit, and my mother's tongue assist me.
ARMADO
Sweet invocation of a child, most pretty and pathetical.
MOTH
,
, ,
,
If she | be made | of white | and red,
, ,
, oo
Her faults | will nere | be known,|
, ,
, ,
For blush|ing cheeks | by faults | are bred
, ,
___ ___
And fears | by pale | white | shown:
,
, , ,
Then if | she fear,| or be | to blame,
, , ,
oo
By this | you shall | not know,|
, ,
, ,
For still | her cheeks | possess | the same
, ,
, oo
Which nat|ive she | doth owe.|
A dangerous rhyme master against the reason of white and red.
ARMADO
Is there not a ballad boy, of the King and the Beggar?
MOTH
The world was very guilty of such a ballad some three ages since, but I
think now 'tis not to be found: or if it were, it would neither serve for
the writing, nor the tune.
ARMADO
I will have that subject newly writ ore, that I may example my digression by
some mighty precedent. Boy, I do love that country girl that I took in the
park with the rational hind Costard: she deserves well.
MOTH
To be whipped: and yet a better love than my master.
ARMADO
Sing boy, my spirit grows heavy in love.
MOTH
And that's great marvel, loving a light wench.
ARMADO
I say sing.
MOTH
Forbear till this company be past.
[Enter DULL, COSTARD, and JAQUENETTA]
DULL
Sir, the duke's pleasure, is that you keep Costard safe, and you must suffer
him to take no delight, nor no penance, but he must fast three days a week:
for this damsel, I must keep her at the park, she is allowed for the
day-woman. Fare you well.
ARMADO
I do betray myself with blushing: Maid.
JAQUENETTA
Man.
ARMADO
I will visit thee at the lodge.
JAQUENETTA
That's hereby.
ARMADO
I know where it is situate.
JAQUENETTA
Lord how wise you are!
ARMADO
I will tell thee wonders.
JAQUENETTA
With that face?
ARMADO
I love thee.
JAQUENETTA
So I heard you say.
ARMADO
And so farewell.
JAQUENETTA
Fair weather after you.
DULL
Come Jaquenetta, away.
[Exeunt DULL and JAQUENETTA]
ARMADO
Villain, thou shalt fast for thy offences ere thou be pardoned.
COSTARD
Well sir, I hope when I do it, I shall do it on a full stomach.
ARMADO
Thou shalt be heavily punished.
COSTARD
I am more bound to you than your fellows, for they are but lightly rewarded.
ARMADO
Take away this villain, shut him up.
MOTH
Come you transgressing slave, away.
COSTARD
Let me not be pent up sir, I will fast being loose.
MOTH
No sir, that were fast and loose: thou shalt to prison.
COSTARD
Well, if ever I do see the merry days of desolation that I have seen, some
shall see.
MOTH
What shall some see?
COSTARD
Nay nothing, Master Moth, but what they look upon. It is not for prisoners
to be too silent in their words, and therefore I will say nothing: I thank
God, I have as little patience as another man, and therefore I can be quiet.
[Exeunt MOTH and COSTARD]
ARMADO
I do affect the very ground (which is base) where her shoe (which is baser)
guided by her foot (which is basest) doth tread. I shall be forsworn (which
is a great argument of falsehood) if I love. And how can that be true love,
which is falsely attempted? Love is a familiar, Love is a devil. there is no
evil angel but Love, yet Samson was so tempted, and he had an excellent
strength; yet was Solomon so seduced, and he had a very good wit. Cupid's
butt-shaft is too hard for Hercules' club, and therefore too much odds for a
Spaniard's rapier: The first and second cause will not serve my turn: the
passado he respects not, the duello he regards not; his disgrace is to be
called boy, but his glory is to subdue men. Adieu valor, rust rapier, be
still drum, for your manager is in love; yea he loveth. Assist me some
extemporal god of rhyme, for I am sure I shall turn sonnet. Devise wit,
write pen, for I am for whole volumes in folio.
[Exit]